Here are 5 common conflict handling styles used by people, have a read and see what style you get towards most!
COMPETE/DOMINATE
When to compete or dominate
• When quick, decisive action is needed
• On important issues for which unpopular courses of action need implementing
• On issues vital to group welfare; when you know you are right
• When protection is needed against people who take advantage of non-competitive behaviour
Potential negative consequences
• You will evenntually be surrounded by "yes" people
• People will be afraid of admitting ignorance or uncertainty around you
• Distorted perceptions about you
• Reduced communication from others
• Damaged relationships
• Reduced commitment
COLLABORATE/INTEGRATE
When to collaborate or integrate
• When both sets of concerns are too important to be compromised
• When the objective is to test your own assumptions or better understand the views of others
• When there is a need to merge insights from people with different perspectives on a problem
• When incorporating others' concerns into a consensus decision can increase commitment
• When working through hard feelings that have been interfering with an interpersonal relationship
Potential negative consequences
• Too much time spent on an insignificant issue
• Ineffective decisions made from the input of people unfamiliar with the full situation
• Unfounded assumptions about trust
COMPROMISE
When to compromise
• When goals are moderately important but not worth the effort and potential disruption of more assertive modes
• When two opponents with equal power are strongly committed to mutually exclusive goals
• When temporary settlements are needed on complex issues
• When quick solutions are necessary under the pressure of time
Potentially negative consequences
• You are not fully satisfied
• The solution will be short lived
• You become cynical as you feel sold out
• Losing sight of larger issues, principles, long term objectives, values and welfare, by focusing on practicalities.
AVOID
When to avoid conflict
• When an issue is trivial
• When there is no chance of getting what you want
• When the potential damage of confrontation outweighs the benefits of resolution
• When you need to cool down, reduce tension and regain perspective and composure
• When there is need to gather more information
• When others can resolve the conflict more effectively
• When the issue is really a symptom of another fundamental issue.
Potential negative consequences of over avoiding
• Decisions will be made by default (without your input)
• There will be unresolved issues
• Your energy will be sapped as you find yourself "sitting" on issues
• Self doubt created because of lack of esteem
• Your creative input and improvements will be prevented
• Lack of credibility
ACCOMODATE/OBLIDGE
When to accommodate or oblige during conflict
• When you realise that you are wrong
• When the issue is much more important to the other person
• When continued competition would only damage the cause
• When subordinates need to develop and be allowed to learn mistakes
• When continued competition would only damage the cause
• When "credits" need to accumulated for issues that are more important
Potential negative consequences
• Decreased influence, respect or recognition, because of over humility
• Lack of discipline from people around you
• Frustration because your own needs won't be met
• The best solution might be ignored
• Your self esteem might be undermined
